Sunday, April 12, 2015

Is This Really Christmas?

       It was about 12 midnight and there was about what seemed like a week til christmas would land. Me and my family were sleeping safe and sound until my dad got a phone call from my grandma. He said that he had to rush to the hospital since my grandpa was sick. I didn't ask what happened though. Me and my mom went back to sleep. I worried, but I knew that my grandpa was a very strong man. He got sick many times, he even survived a fire accident. I knew he could fight the sickness.

     The following day, when I woke up, I asked my yaya what happened and she told me that he was near their house, playing cards, lost the game, and fainted. His friend left him to go ask for help. That afternoon, me and my mom went to the hospital. We went to a waiting room. As I walked out of the elevator, I saw my uncle, cousins, and my aunt outside. It was very dull. I assume it was like that because of all the gloomy faces and the sad weather. We got inside the room and I found out it was for the family members of patinents in the ICU. I was only grade 2 back then, I didn't know what it meant. I saw all my other relatives. My dad, grandma, other uncles and aunts, but no grandpa. We waited there for lots of hours and days.
      There were two days before christmas eve and we finally got out of the gloomy ICU waiting room and had two private rooms where my grandpa was. We were all together. We were supposed to have a gift giving tomorrow like always, but now it looks like another day passed and today was christmas eve. We were all still in the rooms, each doing anything to entertain and keep ourselves up. At about 11:25 pm, we all went to the first room where my grandpa was and the second room was empty. We all sat there eyes on my grandpa. Time passed.... The doctor said he could pass away. 11:30 .... 11:35 ..... 11:40 ..... 11:45 ......  everyone was standing still. Everyone was saying, I love you, don't leave us!, We need you! And the most unbelievable thing happend....12:00 midnight. It was Christmas. Lines in the monitor went straight. Cries were heard from each and every person. 

     The cries were moved outside. The most unexpected thing happened. Outside the room, in the hallway, two gifts inside brown paper bags were near the door. One small one and one big one. There was a note attached. The small bag said; To: Stuart, From: Santa Claus. The bigger one said To: Athena From: Santa Claus. I opened the gift and it has candies, marshmallows, and a brown teady bear. Now that's unforgettable. That's even proof that Santa Claus is real. We were all in that room, crying and it was impossible if any one of us were crazy enough to not feel sad and put the gifts outside. Santa Claus is real. I believe. Anyways, I didn't really feel that happy. I wanted my grandpa to stay alive. I didn't expect that he'd pass away so fast. That night, I went with my grandma, older cousin, uncle, and two aunts as the others including my parents paid the fees at the hospital. I couldn't sleep that night. Things came so fast.

       For the following days, me and my family slept at grandma's in Bulacan. The first funeral was located at of course, grandma's. In my memory, the funeral at grandma's seemed like a whole month but was really about three or two weeks. Since their house was quite big, each night was filled with people, tables, chairs, and food. I went near my grandpa's coffin. Me and my family slept at grandma's everyday. New year came and we spent it there, of course. 12:00 am. January 1, 2012. We lit up fireworks and the night was beautiful. Fireworks were seen anywhere you'd look. My grandpa was surely smiling down at us. The second funeral was at a place called Arlington. Now that place was air conditioned. At some days when the number of guests were few, me and my cousin would go to the play area. One 5 am at the funeral, there was a small number of guests. We finally had our family gift giving. I recieved a lot of gifts but it wasn't very happy as it seems. A few days before new year came, me and my family (mom, dad and me) went back home. As I went near the Christmas tree, I saw a gift from my parents which was a Barbie marker box. The second one was a barbie pencil bag from Santa, again. I received a lot of gifts. Yet with all those gifts, I didn't feel that it was Christmas. I didn't feel the Christmas spirit. My grandpa was missing. He wasn't with us.

     A few days passed and my grandpa (and his coffin😢😣) was brought back to grandma's. I woke up, took a bath, and wore a white gown, white shoes with slight heels, a white flower headband, and a black pin. I looked kinda pretty. But I wasn't fully dressed. I didn't smile. I went outside and saw a few chairs set up just like in the previous funeral. I heard that a mass was about to start in a few minutes. I approached my grandpa's coffin. I realized something. He was dead. He was smiling. There he was, it looked like death was an old friend to him and he smiled. He smiled peacefully. The mass started and we ended up in the cemetery. I was one of the many people wearing white. I was in the front. Crying as the coffin was closed. The coffin was put inside a box like shape made out of cement. It hurt. I didn't feel happy at all. The pain I was feeling was indescribable. 

      A few days after that, a label with his name was sticked onto the cement. I could only remember one label. "Died: December 24, 2011. Days flied away so fast and it was quite hard to move on. Especially for my dad. And here I am now. Writing in my blog. I am sure about one thing. I am sure I'm not making a mistake. I'm sure that my grandpa is smiling at me at this very moment.





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