I'm just going to go straight to the point, and not ponder over the grief that, I too have about this matter. Marcos being buried in the "Libingan Ng Mga Bayani" is truly an indescribable and horrid thing, and I would never forget the goosebumps and sinking of my heart when I heard that he, A guy who killed, totured, and stole could be called a damn hero.
At the moment I heard about the terrifying news, I immediately checked your Facebook wall, and could not believe how true and honest my instincts were acting. Again, kids our age don't give a single thought about these matters, only probably if you write for the school paper or something. But you, you care so much and it's as though you've been there all throughout the dark times, mad and extremely against Martial Law. I kinda hate to say it (I LOATHE SUGARCOATED STUFF, JSYK.), but this makes me like you even more. This is saying something, because I already liked you so much months ago, and I didn't think that it could get any worse. But still, I haven't fallen completely because just like always, I have four words.
I. Don't. Know. You.
I kept on talking to myself earlier, begging and desperate for some action to happen, since I hate to admit it, but I'm becoming quite eager to know you (WHAT DID I JUST SAY....). But I don't want to see you in real life. I know that it'll be awkward and you'll see me as someone who I'm not. But I've also thought about it and, it's also impossible for us to not meet at least once more in the future, since our moms are kind of like friends. I can't stand thinking of how awkward and red my face will be when that day comes.
I know that it's impossible for what I usually dream of in love to become a reality. For in love, the impossible is just impossible. As everyone knows, I'm very focused on my dreams and never give up, and I don't believe in the impossible. But when it comes to thie, I strongly think that the impossible is simply, impossible. That's it. You can't do anything, even with hard work. And how will all my pathetic visions be a reality? I know for a fact that we live in two separate and different worlds. You barely know me. But I accept this sad truth, because from the very first dream I had of you, on the night of 12th February, I knew from the start that it was all a dream, impossible.
But still, I didn't just let go for some reason I can't explain. I think it's because it just makes me happy. I love the feeling of waking up completely merry as I remember my dream of you. I love even more the feeling of looking at your Facebook wall and letting my dreams collaborate with reality. But what I love the most, is when I write about you. Perfecting A Princess wouldn't have been how it is, or it wouldn't even exist without you. And putting you in my stories lets me think of you more, and even allows me to have adventures with you through my own head and imagination. And how weird and odd it is for a girl you never knew to practically be obsessed with you, and you don't have a single clue. If you discover this, it's all going to sound surreal.
I know what you're thinking, these are such stupid reasons for me to suddenly fall, but out of everything I can put into words and explain thouroughly, I cannot manage to explain THIS situation. You are my first, and I doubt that I'll ever think or like anyone else like you.
You know who you are. Another unsent letter this is, but if the day comes when your eyes finally read this, word per word with your heart beating loudly, a teeny tiny part of me right now prays and hopes and wishes, that I'll be right next to you, saying one thing for the rest of life.
OKAY, WHAT JUST HAPPENED? WHAT DID I JUST SAY? I HATE SUGARCOATED STUFF. UGH WHAT DID I DO.